Testing her is necessary to determine whether or not she is, in fact, an undercover humanoid mantis alien looking to make a meal out of you, as roughly 35% of Earth’s human females are estimated to be.
This post made me a little sad until some squid guy showed up and made a comment, which is pretty much the exact opposite of Spongebob.
Steppin’ on Thorin’s toes, toes, punchin’ Bofur in the nose, nose…
Click for biggerization. Full credit to Marchingjaybird. When she came up with this, I thought I was going to die laughing.
I freaking hate cats but I’d let this one use my X-Box.
my dream is to one day make enough money to remake the movie twilight so that everything is exactly the same except edward cullen is played by kanye west and kanye west doesnt have a script and isn’t even aware of what the plot of the movie is, he’s just kanye west reacting to twilight in real time
“your skin is pale white and ice cold”
“bitch I’m black what are you on”
This morning while I was getting ready I was watching Sesame Street.
They were doing this bit where some clown was trying to wash his hands but kept washing his feet or his elbows and Elmo would go, “no mister noodle, your HANDS!” and all the tv kids would laugh.
Around the fourth or fifth time he couldn’t find his hands, I heard a grown man yell from somewhere else in the motel, “GODDAMMIT, MR. NOODLE.”
LITERALLY MY FAVORITE STORY ON ALL OF TUMBLR.
It doesn’t matter what kind of blog you have, this won’t make it ugly. Please reblog this and raise awareness of watermelon abuse.
when i start a new show
halfway into the first season:
on my deathbed someone better say this to me
on my deathbed
someoneThe Doctor better say this to me